{ September 10 }

{My Monday morning run picture}

 

Oh my where do I even start ......I had such good intentions this year and especially new start of another school year. But its been quite the month and year really so summing it all up in  a perfect little package wouldn't do it justice or be real, since we do real life around here..... its been a hard adjustment for me this September a struggle with myself I guess.  

I spent the summer being useful and serving and helping someone {refer to previous post if you don't know what I'm talking about:)... else having him in the house brought a different dynamic to our home the kids loved having him here and I did too if I'm being honest because it made me a better mom. First of all if someone is living in your house your reactions to things are much more thought out;) ... believe me the kids were lucky and they know that. They tried to get away with things and sometimes I had such a hard time getting them to listen. It made me evaluate how I do things cleaning & cooking teaching, parenting and how much I do for them that they never notice. You can begin to feel obviously like GLUE because if we didn't do everything we do........... everything would fall apart its nice to have help once in awhile .....its nice to be noticed and  appreciated and told it too. Or you start to feel a little resentful, alone and invisible. 

As moms we give, give, give and the blessings are there you just have to look closely at the little things sometimes. Anyway September came and all the kids went to school, and our summer house guest DM went to school and didn't really need us like he did before that kinda left a big hole too for all of us.  

It's been a hard adjustment for me I started feeling old is 40 old?  & washed up kinda invisible and wondered who I am? what are my interests? What do I even like to do. 

Without my kids maybe I don't know ....I kinda feel like a nobody figuring out that its finding where I fit in at this stage. I don't need to work or want to right now either because my kids are only young once and I like to be there when they do need me. 

 I'm beyond the little kid stage all the new first have become lasts now and I'm left hanging out in the middle somewhere. Its hard when your husband works all the time..... is the bishop all the time and carries loads he can't even talk about.  He has so many things going all the time because that's his life. 

My life is my home and children and somewhere in here..... I need to find what I like? where I'm going? and what I can do too? so I don't feel lost. I've done parent council for years and kinda lost my spot this year because of a misunderstanding so it felt like the things I had going didn't pan out either... I sub which I enjoy once in awhile....I don't have a calling that keeps me busy or any Sunday involvement at all but I help where I can there too. I barely have friends because they all work or have little kids and that busy stage of littles. 

Its just weird I guess and its just finding where I belong and what I can do to improve and find fulfillment along the way too. Thankfully I have a great husband who works hard for our family and provides and loves us so that I can be home for the kids and I don't take that for granted, but I don't want to lose me along the way either. 

Whoever me is. 

How about some 10 random things to lighten things up around here:))

1. Truth.

 2. Another School Year I can hardly believe it!! Jr. High for Ms. L and Grade 9 for the big K! Who is almost 6 feet tall!! Seriously so tall!

 Grade 5 for my brown eyed independent boy!

Grade 2! for this handsome boy I really miss him during the day

3. Football Fall and Friends

4. New family pics love these people

 Kinsey Holt Photography was our photographer this year we love her!

 The squinty crew....

 5. We had a work day and planted 26 trees all day long! We had a system and everybody had a job so much work to do...

 6. So sad its to dark in the early morning hours now to run outside depressing that my treadmill is already getting used but on the weekend or no school days outside it is and its so much better:) This was monday morn it was so amazing! The whole sky was involved!

7. We finally got a piano and all my kids who have had piano lessons actually sat down to play it was heavenly! hoping one of them really learns to play;) But so nice to have music in the house!

8. Add in piano lessons, YW/YM, Cubs, Basketball camps,  flag football, Saturday football games....which by the way our jr comets are doing awesome we've won all so far they work hard:) 

L tried out for Volleyball but sadly didn't make it she really really wanted it.. so she took it hard but good life lessons along the way and a big hug:) 

We learn early life isn't fair and we learn to work harder for what we really want.

9. Its this guys 42nd!! Birthday on Friday!! So if you see him give him a shout out {{and any great birthday ideas ?I'm dying here we can't get away {which would be the optimum choice ....needed for both of us }} 

so anybody got something new and exciting....... anyone??

10. Good advice for all of us

"Discovering who we truly are is part of this great adventure called life."

-Dieter F. Uchtdorf

Have a great week make it count...