{If you look inside....Me thinks}

Take a look.....

If you looked into my home,

You'd see that family means a lot random pictures scattered throughout, you'd see kids getting ready to sleep, books lying on the floor in almost every room from being read to or looked at, you'd hear a dishwasher running from the days dishes, the lingering smell of fresh buns and hot soup, a singing baby as he sings himself to sleep, a big boy D relaxing on the couch on his "fake" book {ie.his blackberry play book for work..he calls my side of things the "lie" pad {ipad} fun times, you'd see lots of projects finally getting done around, you'd see children's art work, lego pieces and laughter, you'd see  a mother trying to keep up with kids, you'd see content minds drifting off after a long day of playing....

If you looked into my office, 

you'd see where I spend a lot of time. You'd see a board full of places to be and places to go, you'd see backpacks and coats laying on the floor, a hockey stick from a street hockey game today, 

you'd see papers to be filed, homework to finish...... projects to be done and a piano waiting to be practiced. 

you'd see primary stuff scattered over the desk and past projects waiting to be cleaned up from the rush of the weekend, you'd see a plaque that reads count your blessings that I read everyday I'm in here and I do just that.. You'd see books and discarded clothes and water bottles and toys dropped at childrens backs...

you'd see its lived in and far from clean and perfect....

If you looked into my e-mail,  

you'd see questions to be answered, lots of pinterest junk emails, you'd see pictures of my kids sent from my i phone, you'd see thoughtful notes from random people that came at the exact time I needed them and there they stay, you'd see that I keep it pretty cleaned out...

If you looked into my phone,   

You'd see beautiful pictures of places I wish to go someday as my lock screen and home screen..... you'd see organized with pictures a contact list, you'd see my 365 project ......you'd see no games for kids well actually there might be a couple but hardly any and none that they know about so they can't overtake it:) 

You'd see weather apps and bill apps to keep organized...... you'd see texts from some of my favorite people ones that make you laugh ones that make you cry and ones that just make you smile:) 

You'd see something{the phone itself lol} I said I didn't need or want but I do kind of like it, you'd see it isn't attached to me though you'd see that half of the time I forget to even bring it with me...


If you looked into my head,  

you'd wonder how I function with so many thoughts running around , you'd see my desire to have a baby even just once.... and the pain that is still there everyday especially with each passing year wondering why somethings are and when the answers you've been promised will come,
you'd see a crazy girl who has a obsession with helping the kids to understand that when you choose the right you are happier, if you listen and obey good things come, 

You'd see how frustrated I get with myself to do things right to understand things like sewing or simple math to help my kids with there homework its just not there. You'd see a girl who has an obsessive fear of gaining weight and who lets the number on the scale each morning determine her thought process for the day .....you'd see how much I appreciate my family and friends and how well they know me and you'd see how much their phone calls, notes and  texts mean to me....

you'd see a girl who tries so hard to be patient, loving and understanding, you'd see a mother who just wants good things to happen for her kids, for them to be happy make right choices .......you'd see a primary president who wants to make everybody especially those cute little kids happy and to feel needed, loved and appreciated...You'd see the need I have for the boring to go and change to come sometimes I feel it the need for change ..

You'd see a girl who dreams of cobblestone streets everyday and can't get it out of my head ...you'd see someone who has a huge desire to travel the world and see things and cultures... you'd see a mom who needs to be a mom first and those other  things will come in time.......
you'd see the questions and wonderment at why do people do the things they do the choices they make that affect so many around them you'd see how sad it makes me that people get so far off track,  who ruin so much for a fleeting moment of bad decisions....

you'd see a girl who can't imagine what life would be like with no kids if we hadn't gone to a lot of work, prayer and guidance and miracles with everyone associated with each of our children... to get these little people here you'd see a girl who feels blessed everyday. You'd see the memories in the making and the ones I want to cherish forever...


If you look into my heart.  

You'd see what matters most to me. My family above all, you'd see my testimony and faith, you'd see my desire to do what I'm supposed to do to get to where I want to be and to have a lot of my questions answered, you'd see my dreams ....desires. for myself, my children, for us..... for the future.  you'd see the aches and pains mostly for the kids and all they have before them.... you'd see that its full of love..... full of faith ....full of peace, 

full of aching and yearning at the same time too for all that isn't...yet...

you'd see an understanding that to every season there is a time don't wish it away, you'd see that I can hardly believe how fast time goes by, you'd see it aches for those that don't get it. you'd see its full...

Life is good.
Today...

That's what you'd see.. if you looked.
{thanks Lynn for the inspiration}
What do you see??

--------------------------------------

"More people give up, than fail."

{Thankful.}

 

via pinterest

Thankful Thursday again I love this day of the week and so badly each week think of it but don't get that far most weeks anymore!
It gives me all week to think what I am most thankful for though probably a habit from doing it every week which is good right.

Thankful for the snow that feel today I get really bored of day in day out normal weather I know I'm weird give me a good storm and a weather warning that excites me:)

Thankful for K who helps L with her homework a lot of the time it kind of warms my heart to see them working together after school sometimes...

I'm thankful for a husband who runs errands like buying 15 pillows forms from ikea:) for a craft group I'm in.... yes I'm going to learn to sew if it kills me:)  he willingly did that for me he's good like that and I love that about him..

I'm thankful for the calling I have that makes me stretch and gets me out of my comfort zone I know I've said that before but its true I do somethings now that I hated before and I think we only get better at things as we do them part of learning and growing right....

I'm thankful for a warm bed, a home, and children to fill it, our prayers may not get answered the way we think they should all the time.... but I'm learning that its more like accepting a different path or plan and sometimes its far better then it could have been when you start looking around at all you have that you thought you never would.....

I'm thankful for the smiles my kids give me especially if they are doing something they shouldn't be doing.....more importantly the ones that say I love you and the sweet little hugs...

I'm thankful for the moments when all my kids are laughing and helping each other or hearing one say  "there ya go buddy" after he helped get a zipper up or helped one get ready for bed....

or hearing L the other night telling me what made her happy that day was

that her brothers told her they loved her when they were playing then she smiled like it was the best thing ever. and really it is all we ever want is to love and be loved......

---------------------
I'm thankful for
all the small simple things I take for granted

because I wouldn't trade a moment of it to
WALK A MILE IN HER SHOES

I'm thankful for all the daily reminders  

to try a little harder to be a little better

" Perhaps the greatest charity comes when we are kind to each other, when we don't judge or categorize someone else, when we simply give each other the benefit of the doubt or remain quiet. Charity is accepting someone's differences, weaknesses, and shortcomings, having patience with someone who has let us down, or resisting the impulse to become offended when someone doesn't handle something the way we might have hoped. Charity is refusing to take advantage of another's weakness and being willing to forgive someone who has hurt us.
Charity is expecting the best of each other."
-Marvin J. Ashton

--------------------------
I love quotes like this and am so thankful for words that make me take a step back and look at what I'm doing or thinking.  

We have no idea where people have been to get to where they are now, to make us who we are and why we are are here. But I'm thinking if we did walk a mile in there shoes we would learn a lot....
we judge at first sight way to much.

----------------------------

 Thankful for LIFE. The one chance we have..is all about ...

The Race

by D. H. Groberg

Whenever I start to hang my head in front of failure's face, my downward fall is broken by the memory of a race. A children's race, young boys, young men; how I remember well, excitement sure, but also fear, it wasn't hard to tell. They all lined up so full of hope, each thought to win that race or tie for first, or if not that, at least take second place. Their parents watched from off the side, each cheering for their son, and each boy hoped to show his folks that he would be the one. The whistle blew and off they flew, like chariots of fire, to win, to be the hero there, was each young boy's desire. One boy in particular, whose dad was in the crowd, was running in the lead and thought "My dad will be so proud." But as he speed down the field and crossed a shallow dip, the little boy who thought he'd win, lost his step and slipped. Trying hard to catch himself, his arms flew everyplace, and midst the laughter of the crowd he fell flat on his face. As he fell, his hope fell too; he couldn't win it now. Humiliated, he just wished to disappear somehow. But as he fell his dad stood up and showed his anxious face, which to the boy so clearly said, "Get up and win that race!" He quickly rose, no damage done, behind a bit that's all, and ran with all his mind and might to make up for his fall. So anxious to restore himself, to catch up and to win, his mind went faster than his legs. He slipped and fell again. He wished that he had quit before with only one disgrace. "I'm hopeless as a runner now, I shouldn't try to race." But through the laughing crowd he searched and found his father's face with a steady look that said again, "Get up and win that race!" So he jumped up to try again, ten yards behind the last. "If I'm to gain those yards," he thought, "I've got to run real fast!" Exceeding everything he had, he regained eight, then ten... but trying hard to catch the lead, he slipped and fell again. Defeat! He lay there silently. A tear dropped from his eye. "There's no sense running anymore! Three strikes I'm out! Why try? I've lost, so what's the use?" he thought. "I'll live with my disgrace." But then he thought about his dad, who soon he'd have to face. "Get up," an echo sounded low, "you haven't lost at all, for all you have to do to win is rise each time you fall. Get up!" the echo urged him on, "Get up and take your place! You were not meant for failure here! Get up and win that race!" So, up he rose to run once more, refusing to forfeit, and he resolved that win or lose, at least he wouldn't quit. So far behind the others now, the most he'd ever been, still he gave it all he had and ran like he could win. Three times he'd fallen stumbling, three times he rose again. Too far behind to hope to win, he still ran to the end. They cheered another boy who crossed the line and won first place, head high and proud and happy -- no falling, no disgrace. But, when the fallen youngster crossed the line, in last place, the crowd gave him a greater cheer for finishing the race. And even though he came in last with head bowed low, unproud, you would have thought he'd won the race, to listen to the crowd. And to his dad he sadly said, "I didn't do so well." "To me, you won," his father said. "You rose each time you fell." And now when things seem dark and bleak and difficult to face, the memory of that little boy helps me in my own race. For all of life is like that race, with ups and downs and all. And all you have to do to win is rise each time you fall. And when depression and despair shout loudly in my face, another voice within me says,  "Get up and win that race!"   What are you most thankful for today?

{ 10 for Tuesday ..}

1. Holy I always have good intentions of doing other post during the week like a thankful Thursday again but the weeks get away on me! SO another week, a head cold and lovely tantruming 5 year old today..some days are hard ....thankful for those days too cause they are a lot easier then what some people deal with:) 

2. Ever look at your kids and wonder when there hands starting looking like little man hands or when your daughter started looking a little taller and slender? or your baby isn't so much a baby but a big talking kid who still warms your heart every time he's in the room...I pray we are missing the terrible two's with him but I do remember the 3's should be called the terrible 3's haha so I'm holding out for my calm, sweet big boy to stay that way...

I love his sweet sloppy kisses he plants on me randomly on my forehead or cheek or  the way he says "be nice" when the big kids are fighting or something, I love the way he gets so excited to see me when I've been out, I love his big blue eyes and his perfect little hand in mine leading me to show me something he has done.....and that perfect little hand that fits in mine will one day be a big man hand before I know it and so right now I love every second of him and his perfect little hands...

3. Ever feel like the winter that isn't much of a winter is so depressing almost in Jan and Feb? Feels like all I do sometimes is clean up or bake hence the 5 lb winter gain I suppose right? Is that why people go on trips away now? The days feel long, the kids feel cooped in and life seems to s l o w right down... summer days start feeling so far away and spring feels like its still so far off :( I just want to run outside and go on walks but isn't that how we all get this time of year!

4. Our downstairs bathroom finally done I couldn't find a before but it was just cement and wood so here it is
 not all the way decorated but getting there..

exciting to have it done For some reason the laundry baskets are so full all I can think is because they actually put there pj's away and use the same towel for more than one shower :) its very very nice!! and so thankful for my handy handy man and my brother for helping us out!

5. We had a meeting for our primary workers Sunday night it went really good and we made a fruit pizza bar for refreshments that we saw on pinterest so easy and pretty.....it turned out really good I thought....we have great people in our primary makes it fun and my job easier:) 

pic via pinterest

6. I love the new shows the firm and Alcatraz....needed a good fast paced show like lost or all time favorite prison break:) I loved and miss our prison break netflicks marathon D and I had.... so awesome....

7. I absolutely hate girl drama in school nothing makes me madder and sadder than how girls treat each other ....I hung out with guys in high school much easier that way I had good friends too but I hung out alot with my brother and friends ...seriously girls can be so petty judgmental and picky....I guess we all learn who our real friends are that way too don't we and hope that our children don't have to go through so much hurt....

8. I kind of really like these earrings.... my sister in law alley gave me a pair at Christmas and I ordered some pretty much the day after and love them:)  they are light, don't hurt my ears at all and I am super allergic to most metals,  and have a super cute vintagey feeling....found here

picture via hoopla

9. I love my iphone yes I just said that..... this behind the times no cell phone girl .......likes having a phone and texting I know big eh!! I love these apps a journaling type picture fun one a day....called my 365 give it a try:)

so fun:) I also love these fun girly backgrounds and someday I might get a cover to match:)

...from here

10. and my favorite quote of the week

via pinterest

HAVE A GREAT WEEK:)

{ Me thinks ..}

D took me away this week for a nice getaway just the two of us Friday night and even asked grandma if she'd babysit the kids and K2 went to his other favorite person DJ:) Thanks so much you guys!! Everybody had fun we had snow relaxation, and a nice brush with a guard rail on straight ice with a cliff on the other side below in the mountains thankfully we were fine a little scary and we weren't going fast at all anyway...

cold and windy in case you couldn't tell by my awesome hair:) so fun i♥us

       

Stayed here and enjoyed the wintry bliss we were going to go cross country skiing but when we woke up the next morning there were 100km wind warnings so that wouldn't have been to fun:) But it was SO nice to get away just the two of us! The best kind of mom birthday presents time away and peace! Simple things

After the night there we got back to grandmas and headed two hours away to my nieces baptism which I had to speak at too. Was a beautiful occasion and turned out great. Wish I would have got a picture with her or of her though sad. Then we booted it home and went to a party ha ha crazy people we are! It made for a long day but so much fun.

Our new couch also came this weekend..... talk about barely fitting in our house thanks to friends who know what they are doing and D they made it and we are loving it!! Thanks C & T for all you did:) 

simple things...friends an d family that go above and beyond

We are slowly getting things done around here its nice the bathroom is almost done, and the dresser makeover is just about complete.....  then I can show pictures :) The basement is a constant but we are slowly getting there. Any suggestions on what to do for the windows? and pillows that match the room:) thoughts??  LMK! 

This couch is so dang comfy!   Love it!

Simple things that make us happy .....home & comfort.

so with simple things a recipe like this..... my friend gave me a loaf on my birthday and it was so so good we are making it this week my kids loved it!  Simple things = good comfort food Banana Bread best ever:)

for the recipe click here

make it :)

----------------------------------------------------------------

Methinks

{Turn up your volume the first song goes great with this post}

This article made me think about the next generation our girls..about how we see ourselves what our real goals are..we think its bad now it can only get worse I hope our daughters, and women in general can understand someday the difference between...and be more of what we need in this world ....

READ THIS

thoughts? i think we live in a sad, sad world. we look around and think we need to look like a specific image when most of those images have been so altered they aren't realistic in anyway, its sad that we don't think we are good enough so often that we think we have to live up to certain standards that don't exist....

where purity and strength, cleanliness, what god gave us doesn't matter anymore. That there has to be a certain level of competition or the fear that we aren't good enough so we go out and change it or try to and become something we aren't or weren't meant to be...

if we even had the slightest clue what our potentiality and ability to change the worlds thinking if we didn't try so hard to be and do what the world "thinks" we have to live up to....we have enough of those in this world....

It would be much easier to just be us and be okay with every imperfect part of us instead of striving for the unattainable things that don't matter or are so far out of our reach we lose sight of whats important....goes for so many aspects in our lives..

if it were only that easy its a hard world to live in and feel pretty or successful or important or needed....there is so much around surrounding us telling us we aren't good enough or don't measure up... its sad.

It happens to all of us in the moments where we let the negative thoughts creep up on us that we aren't good enough, pretty enough or whatever....

we are good enough, we are all trying hard to keep up and sometimes we lose sight of whats most important.

By building up those around us, not tearing down, not judging, seeing whats inside.... sharing it, building on it and helping each other see can open our eyes and see the beauty within and the potential

that is there in all of us...

Don't let the world tell you otherwise.....

sometimes the simplest things are the most beautiful things in life

and sometimes the things we think matter so much aren't really issues at all or whats important summed up perfectly here....

is what we need more of...

Have a great week...

{Thankful Thursday...}

yeah you have to read it about 3 times to fully get it, or at least I did:)

I just finished reading this book this week and I am fully thankful to be born in this day and age, because I know if I had been born in ww2 times I wouldn't have lived long. Horrific the things that happened, are happening and continue to get worse as the years go on and how easily people forget how we got to this point ....its an awesome book...reading a book like this makes you very thankful for all that you have in your whole life...

.....thankful for quotes like these because I pray for patience quite often and I to want it right now but like all things it takes time....here a little there a little ...love it a good reminder....

I'm mostly thankful for the good things in life.

There is something to be thankful for everyday, we just need to look around.

---------------------------

One thing I won’t let my husband buy me….. 

is probably clothes? I like buying my own :) he likes buying his own though too

One thing I would love to have, but I probably will never have…….. A big beautiful home in the country so expensive to make it out there.

One thing you will never find in my closet…

is acid wash, hypercolor, colored jeans, leg warmers or anything neon please don't come back to stay;)

One thing I love about my face………..

my eyes because I know what it feels like to spend everyday with watery weepy swollen allergy infected eyes we take a lot for granted when we don't have it, ... SO THANKFUL I can keep them under control most days the seasons and weather seem to effect them that probably seems weird but think cotton and cold dry weather....

One thing that I love to do…..

is the things I do that my kids get excited about the times I feel like a good mom thankful for all those moments

One thing I would like to change if I could………... 

are relationships that are strained, for reasons we don’t understand sometimes or know how to change sometimes, sometimes even within our own extended families. I hate seeing people hurt because of others choices so many sad sad situations out there,

One thing I would change as a mom………..

following through the things we start like chore charts or incentive things that we do for awhile then lose there excitement then we kind quit them.... and I'd like to be able spend more time with them just to talk or whatever { I’m working on it and am thankful for the times we do they mean a lot to me} {we do its hard with kids though who all need your attention especially if your trying to do something with one:)

One thing I would do if I had unlimited money………..

would be to help people that need a boast once and awhile or pay anonymously for things, or send a friend or sibling money if they needed a help. I’d love to be an Oprah type person and hear of somebody in need or a want and buy them it whatever it is just to see their faces! wouldn't that be fun:)


One thing that I would like to do……….

help my children know their individual worth for real and how important it is

One thing I could do without………

-laundry ha ha

One thing I love to smell……

is the ocean right about now would be nice or just after it’s rained love that smell 

One thing I would do if I won the lottery……..

pay off our house and buy a piece of land in the country and build our dream home, 

One thing that infuriates me.....

people who talk about people behind their backs and don’t come talk to the source or assume things that just aren’t true until you really know a person you CANNOT judge them.

One thing that I love about winter………..
cozy warm snowy nights

One thing I am addicted to ………

computer - if I’m being honest

One thing I pray for ………….

 just one? strength/patience to get through each day

One thing I wish I had……
an explanation.

One thing I would do again, regardless of the pain……

every minute of getting our children here to this family regardless of the pain so so thankful for each one of them....this is my life.

One thing that I absolutely hate to do………

clean toilets it disgusts me

One thing that is weird about me………..

my hair ha ha

One thing that I need help on………….

math kind of stuff not to brilliant in that department

One thing I find most relaxing………..

a warm bath and a good book after a long tiring day

One thing that could get me in trouble…….

sticking up feistly {is that even a word} for the things I believe in or for the people I love.

One thing that annoys me……..

just one seriously hum....mean kids.

One thing that I have learned, but still sometimes forget…… is
"That this too shall pass" everything is but for a moment we learn from it, move on and start again tomorrow!  Life is short..

 But finding at least one THANKFUL thing from everyday will take us a long way.....something to

look back on and take what we can from it.

So thankful for my life it may be far from perfect but its far better then it ever could have been....

ps

-For my birthday D is taking me away for the night soon just us some cross country skiing, relaxing and whatever we want to do. Love him...

and THANKFUL for grandma and grandpa B who are watching all the kids....

-So thankful for my K2 who amazes me everyday...

ON my birthday he looked at a water bottle

with the words "REACH EVERY STUDENT" 

{he's 2 and half remember}

and

he was reading every letter and for the D and V he made the sounds

 K2 was reading them so we started grabbing other things and pointing to the letters and sure enough 

my little boy knows the letters of the alphabet at 2 

and he's not even potty trained:) AMAZED!! and it has nothing to do with me ....

Thankful. Yes I am EVERYDAY.

{....in my next 30 {6} years....}

 from 1976

to 2012

My bucket list 

I can't believe I'm 36 today:) I used to look around and see people my age and thought I never want to be that old ;0 I hope others don't look at me and think that now too:) Because its not old its more like how did it happen 36 years I've been here crazy....anyway there are a few things I'm hoping to see, do and be in the coming years...

1.  I want to Raise awesome, happy, strong faith filled kids, not sure how to do that other then to teach them, pray, and through example and hope that they know true happiness, love and have a burning testimony for their whole lives...

2. I would like another baby preferably to actually have one  

{just not in my 40's or 50's ha ha surprise not funny :)}

3.lay on the beach in Hawaii or Cancun.....see the ruins and enjoy the sun...

4. travel around Europe take the train and go where it leads....

5.  sit at a bistro on a cobblestoned walk in view of the Eiffel tower.....

6.   go to the grand canyon and hike in it and see the Hoover dam

7. I want to work in the temple when I'm older with D

8. I want to build a house with a big front porch and gables windows, with all my dream touches to it inside{so I need unlimited funds too:}

9. I want to live about 5 minutes out of town with room to run and the kids to play for hours on end.....

10. I want to have horses for the family

11. I want to go on a mission with D while we are not to to old

12. I want to master running and be fit fit :) sculpted and toned {don't we all maybe that will have to wait for the after life lol}

13. I want my kids to KNOW I love them that I have a testimony and that they are loved far more then they have any idea....

14. I want my kids to be friends especially as they grow up

15. Make a difference in at least one person's life. A real difference.

16. I want to get my food storage, documents and emergency stuff all together a really good one....

17. I want to learn how to sew and actually know what I'm doing....

18. I want to be the kind of women who sees the need and serves without being asked

19. go to Australia, new Zealand

20.  go on a church history tour 

21. go to new York

22. be a road tripper in case you haven't caught on yet ha ha

23. have perfect flowing loosely curled long hair someday :)  in my dreams

24. go back to Germany and go see the things I didn't get to see the first time Auschwitz, Jewish museum  I love history...

25.  do genealogy and actually learn about the people

26. go to as many temples around the world that I can.

27. I want to study and KNOW the scriptures and really pray with all my ♥

28. I want my kids to find strong spouses and be as happy as I am with my choose of eternity....

29. I want to get away with my parents and siblings and their spouses and do a fun cruise or vacation somewhere someday....
or D's family and the18 adults it includes

30.  Run a 5k. start ...small and easy

31. Witness and be present at significant moments of all my children lives.

32. pay for someones groceries in line randomly I've always wanted to do that

33.Get a good job to help pay for all the fun things I want to do and see.

34. Go deep sea fishing. {again} with D and watch the waves crash on the shores of a lighthouse

35. I want to sit in my white rocking chair on my big porch holding hands with D in my old old years watching the grandkids play.... heaven what its all about...

36. To enjoy learn and grow each day from the ride of life and whatever may come along with it.....good and bad....life isn't perfect sometimes dreams are crushed, lives are altered........ 

but its all in how we take it that determines how well we make it....

and that is my bucket whats at the top of yours? 

That was actually kind of hard to think up. I feel very blessed with what I have, where I am, where we live.... and the little people in my life no matter how they got here I know my Heavenly Father loves me and has a  plan for me and for that I am very very grateful. Of course one of the greatest of my blessings is the one I get to share my life, D .

 I've had a good 36 years so far so hopefully the next 36 are just as great and better.

Everyone who got where he is has had to begin where he was.  

Robert Louis Stevenson

 and because this is awesome and I love it....

Have a great week make it count :)

{Me Thinks}

 so do what you can today...

Finally things are back to routine its so nice! If you've been reading my blog you know that I love schedules and routine we function better with it, all of us! The kids were happy to go back and I was happy to have them go back. I love em home but I love school too:) Thank you for the great teachers we have here!Two weeks was just a really long time to keep them entertained and busy we didn't have any snow and the wind howled most days its been eerily warm and unseasonable here. So we took them to the park and pizza hut one day {where K2 ate his first dinner lol he never eats supper he eats a large breakfast and lunch and has a snack around 4} Anyway another day D took them swimming for an afternoon they loved it! and loved spending time with Dad..so since k2 hates swimming and I can't get in the water we got to hang out at home. Another day dad took them to the church gym and took balls and they played and ran around and came home tired and happy:) Christmas was great new years too just a really long break.....

So we did New years at my sil's fun times....

we did K's birthday party

kids played with there Christmas Toys and wii time  

{L did too but she doesn't want me to take her picture:)

K2 opened his fun gifts from his birth parents, they {L&C} are the best ever and we love them to so much...

so here's to 2012....

----------------------------------------------------------

Me Thinks

Enjoying every minute you know the saying and I too get it every time I go somewhere and I'm  often thinking of the phrase Enjoy every minute do I?? do you?? There are lots of moments I enjoy and love but there are also moments I wish were over, moments I don't care to ever live through again and moments that break my heart moments of worry moments of loss of patience and moments I pray don't last long....but it does not mean I don't love this time of life these little children and this time this moment its just some of the little moments of the moments that are hard.....

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I read this article by  Glennon at momastry I wanted to share with you today  its really good here are a few parts.... I realized you know what I'm not the only who feels like this some days...read on....

There are two different types of time. Chronos time is what we live in. It’s regular time, it’s one minute at a time, it’s staring down the clock till bedtime time, it’s ten excruciating minutes in the Target line time, it’s four screaming minutes in time out time, it’s two hours till daddy gets home time. 

Chronos is the hard, slow passing time we parents often live in.

Then there’s Kairos time. Kairos is God’s time. It’s time outside of time. It’s metaphysical time. 

It’s those magical moments in which time stands still. I have a few of those moments each day. And I cherish them......

I think parenting young children (and old ones, I’ve heard) is a little like climbing Mount Everest. Brave, adventurous souls try it because they’ve heard there’s magic in the climb. They try because they believe that finishing, or even attempting the climb are impressive accomplishments. They try because during the climb, if they allow themselves to pause and lift their eyes and minds from the pain and drudgery, the views are breathtaking. They try because even though it hurts and it’s hard, there are moments that make it worth the hard. These moments are so intense and unique that many people who reach the top start planning, almost immediately, to climb again. Even though any climber will tell you that  most of the climb is treacherous, exhausting, killer. That they literally cried most of the way up.

And so I think that if there were people stationed, say, every thirty feet along Mount Everest yelling to the climbers – “ARE YOU ENJOYING YOURSELF!? IF NOT, YOU SHOULD BE! ONE DAY YOU’LL BE SORRY YOU DIDN’T!” TRUST US!! IT’LL BE OVER TOO SOON! CARPE DIEM!”  - those well-meaning, nostalgic cheerleaders might be physically thrown from the mountain.

read the whole article here nice to know we aren't alone and its okay

thoughts?

So here's to the moments we love, the moments we enjoy and the moments that are hard.... hope your week is full of moments that matter :) 

{ Good bye 2011.... Hello 2012}

Another year of my LIFE gone ...where did it go well lets see:

1. What did you do in 2011 that you’d never done before?

 - became primary president in February - Went to a pioneer women signing and evening with Ree Drummond and WICKED with friends SO fun! and Time out for women with my mom and sisters -

 

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? 

word for 2011 was

Change

meaning:

 to make the form, nature, content, future course, etc., of (something) different from what it is or from what it would be if left alone:

I made quite a few changes and when I became the primary president  that has been a big big step for me ...to change me and get me out of my comfort zone and it has definitely done that, there were a few things that changed over the year and it was okay...

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
- a few sister in laws and LOTS of friends :)

4. Did anyone close to you die?
-My uncle died in October and we went to quite a few funerals throughout the year

5. What countries did you visit?
- the good US of A more than a few times all good times:)

6. What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?
- a trip away with D somewhere exciting together

-answers to prayers -figuring things out what direction to go next....

7. What dates from 2011 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
-none of great significant {which I guess is a good thing in one way right}

-lots of good things happened just nothing huge and life altering
although

-the ranch fire was crazy and huge but the blessings came with it too

-and I have a pretty amazing husband who takes things they way they are deals with them and moves on....I kind of love him ;)  It was fun to see another side of him the manager side while we were with him fighting the fire, it was a beautiful thing to see all those who came to help those who called offered all sorts of equipment, time and talent and concern. 
thank you.

8. What are your favorite finds this year?

-pinterest :) so fun and so many awesome ideas

-hollister online ha ha
 
-that with a little hard work we could produce a really nice vibrant garden of which we got to freeze and can stuff from it that made me really happy and feeling all domestic like lol ;)

9. What were your favourite new recipes?
My family loved these new ones this year

-Rebecca's Chicken tetrazzini, 

loaded baked potato soup

snickerdoodle muffins

and my family all love these jamba juice recipes they taste exactly the real thing .....They are So good!

these are some of our favorites that everybody loves which you know how hard that is for picky kids and husbands

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

-nope had a mole removed, K2 had stitches and just some colds and a flu other than that we were good count our blessings!

11. What was the best thing you bought?
-a new dishwasher, our new couch that is coming can't wait,
-

12. Where did most of your money go?
-down the drain :) -suburban ahhhh!!! , bathroom finishing and stuff {pictures to come super excited to have it almost done!! D's been working hard my brother Leif came and helped out to get him started and it is looking awesome!!

13. What did you get really excited about?
-getting away for all the girls weekends :) and our family camping/boating trips we went to red deer as a family for a few days in feb, and to boise for my nieces baptism in june, a wedding in aug, a blessing in aug, we had a fun packed summer!

- and of course my garden produce made me super excited:)


14. What song will always remind you of 2011?
-Dean Brody Trial in life

15. Compared to this time last year, are you:
Happier or sadder? same   Thinner or fatter? same    Richer or poorer? hopefully richer tried anyway ha ha

16. What do you wish you’d done more of?
- more activities with my kids like actual planned out ones

17. What do you wish you’d done less of?
- wasting time on meaningless things

18. How did you spend Christmas?

kids got up early were finished unwrapping all at 7:30 am got the kids ready for church then headed to my moms then D's mom for the rest of the day good times!

-it was nice this year going to church on Christmas I really enjoyed Christmas this year was more about just enjoying what came and not worrying to much about what doesn't matter,

19. What was your favorite TV program?

-biggest loser , don't watch much tv anymore nothing worth watching but biggest loser is inspiring and I love it!

20. What were your favorite books of the year?

-the help, all Anita stansfield and Rachael anne nunes, Jennie hansen's new books love em!

21. What was your favorite music from this year?

-Stephan j Anderson music, Dean Brody and I can't even think what other ones right now....

22. What were your favorite films of the year?

-loved the help, didn't watch much this year we did just watch war horse it was good...

23. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

-turned 35 and didn't do much just another day:)

24. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

- watching my children grow up learn new things and turn another year older crazy how fast time goes by.....I loved watching them all find the things that made them happy that they enjoyed...
loved watching L in her dance classes that she loves, 
M got to play soccer he was just excited to get out and do something the big kids were doing, and having my little  peaceful boy K2 along for the ride at all the things we went too in watching the kids he is amazing:)
-and watching K excel and love playing football and all that goes with it to learn disappointment excitement dedication and hard work gets you where you want to be...

i have the awesomest kids how blessed am I
 
25. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?
-cardis, belts and boots

26. What kept you sane?

- reading, getting away with friends,  running, blogging:)

27. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2011.

-Some valuable life lessons I'm learning are that life is short and we never know what can happen tomorrow. That the things that mean the most aren't things and there are only ours for a very short time and what we do with them now will be with us forever. How we treat others, how we talk about others, what kind of example we are and how we serve are all what makes us and passes onto our children through our example and I'm learning how very very important that is more each year!

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Really this past year was one of growth and CHANGE like my theme/word for the year...... all of us changed a little one way or another. It was a good year no big ups and downs a lot of the common everyday things, but in those is where our happy was and is...

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me thinks

AND so this year I decided after thinking about it a lot what I wanted my "word" to be and couldn't think of one till on sunday a quote by president Hinckley hit me ...and I knew this is what I wanted my "word"/theme for the year to be and its
"Try a little harder to be a little better..."

I kind feel like I was so busy with kids and my calling that alot of things that mean a lot to me slipped a bit and I want to try harder to be a little better at:

• saying my prayers
• reading my scriptures
• going to the temple

• being more patient
• getting out with D
• keeping up with laundry
• the cleaning
• the books
• at food storage
• at teaching my children to be kind, loving and calm
• reading to and with the kids
• better at family scripture study and prayer
• learning to sew thats a big goal I have for this year and I'm excited to work on a few new things for myself
• I want to try harder to run better and longer I love this picture

• to really listen to my kids, & D better
• to be better at serving others
• better at family relationships and strengthening those
• playing with my kids

• communicating better 
• understanding better
• simplifying
• eating healthier

• better at changing what doesn't and isn't working
• better at being consistant
• a better example
• better at being ME or the me I hope to BE.
• better at being US.the whole CRAZY bunch of us!

I think we all need to "Try a little harder to be a little better" we do get so busy and its nice to slow down and think and put our efforts where they are needed most. 
Right now that is for my children every day I realize that really some days may be impossible and I feel like I want to run away, but these are all we get with them and we have to do our BEST ...BETTER than we are doing because if we don't we will lose so much more than we think. Everything we do is shaping these beautiful little spirits we have in our homes into the adult they will become and they are so worth our very best efforts...
so I am going to try harder and really really change the things that need changing and put the focus where it needs to be on the very most important people in my life
so here's to 2012. 
HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU ALL

Finally know who you are....this year.